Hate and love
by High Functional Sociopath
Summary: When Hinamori doesn't greet Hitsugaya, he knows something is wrong. But could it be better to leave it there instead of asking and ruining their friendship? Two chapters.
1. Chapter 1

When captain Hitsugaya was around, all female Soul Reapers had suddenly something to say to him from good mornings to opinions about the weather. Yes, they slowed his and their own work by wanting to chat about vanities, and because of that, you could usually see Hitsugaya angrily marching when he had to go to a different squad. Nothing could cheer him up during his trip in tournament – except a glimpse of a certain raven-haired friend.

"Hinamori, good-" Hitsugaya started but froze when the girl walked past him even without looking at him. He turned around, staring at the Soul Reaper who had definitely heard him but hadn't replied, the Soul Reaper who just hurried forwards.

The only person who he really wanted to hear a good morning from, and he wasn't going to get one? No way.

"Hinamori!" Hitsugaya shouted, not caring about people's gazes. He just wanted to stop Hinamori and see her to look at him.

However, the shout didn't slow Hinamori, not at all. She might even step more quickly.

"Lieutenant Hinamori!"

Now Hinamori stopped – but she didn't turn around. Hitsugaya was annoyed, but not only for that. Did he really use his authority to get his friend to greet him?

Hitsugaya removed the distance quickly, stopping front of Hinamori's back. "Turn, lieutenant Hinamori", Hitsugaya said coldly. "Turn and look me in the eye when I speak to you!"

Hinamori clenched her fists and turned slowly around, flashing a fake smile. "Is there anything I can help with, captain Hitsugaya?"

Hitsugaya questioned in announcement: "Since when have you decided to behave respectfully and call me by my title?"

"Something wrong with it?"

Hitsugaya frowned. Something was defnitely wrong with her today, and he was going to know what. "Well, I just wondered", Hitsugaya said, trying to calm Hinamori – yes, she was clearly angry. But why? "It isn't been your habit, since we're friends and all." He saw guilty flashing in Hinamori's brown eyes, but she replaced it quickly with wrath. She obviously wasn't herself. "But since we're friends, why didn't you reply to my greeting?"

"Toshiro Hitsugaya, sometimes I hate you."

Hitsugaya blinked slowly. He was claimed to be a genius, but still these words took several seconds to sink into his mind. Maybe because he never supposed to hear them from Hinamori.

"I hate you when you walk there looking more than just gorgeous, making every female to look at you like some delicious piece of cake. I hate it when you say something clever that everyone sigh with hearts in place of their eyes. I hate how you sometimes talk seriously with people even if they're just trying to flirt with you, and", Hinamori's voice almost broke, "sometimes I just hate you, got it?!"

The thought in Hitsugaya's head was incredible, extremely incredible, but still it was the only possible explanation for Hinamori's weird behaviour. He inhaled deeply, collected some encouragement and was ready to get a negative answer to his question: "Hinamori, are you...are you jealousy of me?"

Hinamori bit her trembling bottom lip in order to hold tears back. "What about if I am?" she asked softly.

Hitsugaya was too stunned to answer anything to this. Jealousy...it was Hitsugaya who usually felt that kind of feelings while male Soul Reapers were near to Hinamori. He found it very annoying that Hinamori might fall in love with one of them. If Hinamori was jealous, could it mean-

"However, even though I sometimes hate you", Hinamori told, "I will always love you."

After saying that, Hitsugaya ended up looking at Hinamori's receding back. Somehow, he found his voice to shout: "Hinamori!" The girl met his confused gaze once again, saying with a cute smile: "I'm just like everyone else, aren't I? You look towards me, and I immediately drown in the sea of your eyes. You have to hardly touch my hand, and it's on fire. However, you won't pay attention to me any more, because I'm not special, I'm not good enough for you." Now Hitsugaya could hear sadness of many years in her voice. He had to say something, say her she was wrong, but when he eventually opened his frozen mouth, Hinamori spoke: "Don't worry, I understand. I myself caused this. We were friends, good friends. If I had left it like this, if I hadn't fallen in love with you and confessed you now, you would still hear me tomorrow, we could still talk properly the next month. I could be part of your life, just as a friend, but a part anyway. I could be a guest in your and someone's wedding", Hinamori told with a smile that shred Hitsugaya's heart to small pieces, "but now I'm not going to get an invitation, aren't I? I won't be allowed be a part of your life longer, right?"

And after her final speech, Hitsugaya was left on the busy aisle. But no matter the amount of people, he felt more lonely than ever. Their long-term friendship had just turned into dust.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks to **bubbly peach** for reviewing the first chapter! And I don't know if you, who read and reviewed my other hitsuhina fic **'Before a war'** , read this fic, but in case you do, I want to thank you for your comments that made me smile. Thanks!

 **Disclaimer:** Obviously Aizen hasn't used Kyoka Suigetsu, since everyone still knows that Bleach is Tite Kubo's work.

Hinamori rushed to the office of the 5th squad. Fortunately, there was no one here, and Hinamori's lonely tears were allowed to flow freely. Now she had done it. Now she had ruined their friendship that had lasted from their childhood, through all hardships, until this day, when it fell down hard.

It hadn't gone a lot of time before Hinamori knew he was there. He was there, standing at the doorway, and Hinamori was so scared that she couldn't move her hands from the front of her face. Awhile they were in silence, before the hand touched her shoulder lightly and her name was whispered tenderly: "Hinamori."

When Hinamori met the gaze of the teal eyes, Hitsugaya offered her a white rose. "Please accept this and listen to what I've to say", he said. Amazed Hinamori took the rose, and Hitsugaya breathed deeply before he began: "Momo Hinamori, sometimes I hate you." Hinamori blinked her eyes, but didn't speak anything.

"I hate you when you think you're not special, I hate you when you think you're not good. Because you're both, you're both special and good to me. I hate it when you expect that after you've confessed me, I'll leave you." Now there was a joyful glint in Hinamori's brown eyes, and Hitsugaya noticed his lips to form a smile too. "Sometimes I just hate you, got it?" Hinamori giggled a little, but the smile was swept away from Hitsugaya's face when he remembered the next part of his speech. What if he had misunderstood everything after all?

"But Hinamori, even though I sometimes hate you…I will always love you."

They just stared into each other's eyes, before Hinamori inquired quietly: "Do you really mean it?"

"Of course I mean it", Hitsugaya replied. "Why would I have said you all these things if I didn't mean it?" Hinamori shrugged as if relaxedly, but looked at the snow white petals and green leaves of the rose while she said: "Maybe you just appreciated our friendship a lot and thought this would be the best means to save it."

A light touch on her smooth cheek got Hinamori raise her head before a tear dropped to the green leaf. "Hinamori", he said, "it's true, I appreciated our friendship a lot. I would have done anything to save it."

Hinamori felt her heart break to pieces like a glass. Well, now she knew how people were able to die of sadness - the sharp pieces of their hearts tore their chest open. What a slow and painful way to die. Wasn't pain in life enough? Why did life have to end in such a cruel way too?

"Yeah, I would have done anything for our friendship", Hitsugaya spoke, "if the end of it meant the end to our acquaintance. But if we both are in love with each other", he flashed a quick smile, "sorry, but I'm not going to do anything for it."

Awhile Hinamori didn't find words. How could she? Their friendship had just ended, and her dreams had come true. One-sided feelings – she could forget what it meant.

"Is it too stupid if I kiss you now?" Hinamori asked softly. "I mean, is it too much the end of the romance story?"

"Does it matter?" Hitsugaya questioned and smiled happily, holding her hands. Hinamori returned his smile.

"Well, not really."


End file.
